What is the Reality & what is the fantasy?

Having a conversation with a friend one day, she asked me a question:

 'Are you really the one in control with your clients? I mean, since you are a Professional Dom, aren't your clients really in control?'

The question has rolled around in my head for weeks. I have argued with myself the different answers, the theory, the philosophy.. I came to the conclusion that she is correct. In actual fact, I am not the 'Top'. I am at their mercy. They are the ones in control, not me.

I can hear Dom's shouting in disgust and disbelief. I can hear them saying; 'We are Dom's, we are the dominant power exchangers. We have slaves, subs. they kneel before us and weep.' Yes, they may well kneel and weep in front of us during a session, but, if you dissect the situation to it's core, WE are their slaves.

You may ask how I came to this conclusion.

Fantasy, fetish and the red shoe

Hilary Davidson explores the colourful history of footwear in fairy tales and folklore

The most magical fictional shoes are those that lift their wearers highest above the earth:

flying, dancing, running or transported to divine realms. As well as being physical, the

elevation can be social or spiritual — above the quotidian. Shoes in fairy tales punish and reward,

elevate and entrap, speed and hinder. They are motifs for childhood innocence and protection — yet

certain footwear also has potent erotic connotations. None more so than when the shoes are red.

Hans Christian Andersen makes his first pair of “red shoes” out of a girl’s feet, rubbed raw by

wooden shoes that are too fine for her peasant origins. For the 19th-century Danish author, clogs,

pattens and other such shoes are poor, cheap, always unmagical footwear, signifying gross rustics

who never rise beyond their earthbound positions.

Can a Dominatrix be Compassionate?

Many people look at a dominatrix as less than a real person. She is someone who is so strong and powerful that she must be beyond emotion.  This is simply not true. In fact, as a Dominatrix, I have to be even more in touch with my emotions and thoughts. I'm not only taking care of myself within a scene / session, but my submissive as well.

In the wrong hands, Domination can have devastating and have dangerous consequences, therefore, the role of a Dominatrix requires some very important qualities, one of which is COMPASSION!

Sinful&Wicked

A Dominatrix needs to understand and feel the needs of her Submissive - A  D/S relationship requires mutual understanding, respect, wants and desires.

Compassion allows the Dominatrix to better connect with her  Submissive - by understanding and accommodating the feelings, needs and wants of her Submissive - by caring about him, the bond between D/S is stronger, healthier and will grow.

A dominatrix is not only with a submissive in order to dominate him - to have her whims and needs met, but also to help her submissive grow as a person and guide him along the path needed for that growth - an understanding and respect of the submissive's needs (emotional, mental, spiritual, physical) are essential.

Compassion. An essential element.

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What is Foot Worship?

Many of us think of our feet as just being appendages of our bodies that take us from one place to the next. That is true for a great many of us. For people who worship the feet, these parts of our bodies can become scared. The practice of foot worship goes far back into our past when a person would lower their entire body on the ground so as to pay homage to a person of higher stature.

    In this context the phrase “kiss the ground that you walk on” literally means that. Here a subordinate person will show their adoration of the higher ranked person by kissing the ground that they walked on. They show they place a high importance on foot worship by acknowledging that even the feet of such a high individual is far superior to them.

    In the olden days slaves were made not only to prostrate themselves before their conquerors but they were forced to lick and kiss the parts of the floor that the “superior” race had walked on. This method of foot worship showed they understood their status.

    Foot worship can also be associated with foot fetish. Here items of the feet like socks, shoes, toenail rings and others become objects of sacred interest. These items cause the individual to venerate and worship the objects. The objects in this case will take the place of an actual person’s presence and the foot worship can take place at anytime that it is desired.

    There are other ways of foot worship. These are of an erotic nature as they stimulate sexual desires. In this type of foot worship the foot of a female or a male is kissed and the toes are sucked upon. Also burying one’s head in the soles of another person seems to indicate the subservient nature of that person and the superiority of the other.

Supposedly lowering the entire body and showing adulation to the feet of another person who is of a higher rank by foot worship is a way of saying that one person is unworthy of being in the presence of the other and their worship of the feet acknowledge this. Individuals who perform this type of foot worship will also allow themselves to be walked on, stomped upon and they will even let other people of “higher” ranks trample them without any protest.

    I am sure that there are people who think this sort of behaviour is either weird or erotic. I personally would rather perform foot worship by massaging my feet with soothing creams and lotions. Pamper them by soaking them in a bath of Epsom salts. Finally I would just relax my feet by keeping up on the sofa. This would be my version of foot worship.

Written by: Ajith Guptha