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16 Oct 2021

Ownership, is it for fun only? (Revised)

In recent weeks on social media, ‘ownership’ seems to be a hot topic to discuss and debate about. In fact, it is common to see slaves put status like ‘owned by Mistress/Master ABC’, ‘looking for an owner’, ‘currently unowned’ etc on twitter or Facebook. In addition, I frequently see Mistresses post on their Facebook pages or blogs about owing slaves who do not want to serve. In some more severe cases, there have been reports on owned slaves suddenly blocked their owners and then simply disappeared. These posts make me to feel that ownership nowadays is just a fashionable term. To be exact, it is no longer a mutual relation between the dom and sub. So my question here is, are people still treat ‘ownership’ seriously or it is just a ‘deposable’ item that everyone can choose to start and end the relation at any time without facing any consequences.

Of course, there is nothing wrong to seek for an owner or being owned. However, if we step one-step backward and ask ourselves several questions. Why ownership is important? Is it just a fashionable word or does it mean something valuable for slaves? Why it is necessary to be owned or why slaves would like someone to control them? In this post, I am trying to answer the above questions as a slave’s point of view. As it is a debatable topic, the following is just my personal thoughts and please feel free to agree or disagree what I say.

Ownership, in one sense, means a slave agreed to transfer itself (note: people use it to describe slaves in ancient times) as an asset to its owner. Wait a minute! this means now the owner has full control on how to ‘utilise’ his/her ‘property’ and the slave can only obey and execute all the orders coming from its owner. Doing so means that the slave will lose its freedom but does not seem like one will gain anything form this relation. In other words, it seems like for slaves, ownership is a ‘profitless’ business. Then why slaves are still seeking to be owned?

Personally, I think the feeling of security and an opportunity to play a part in the owner’s daily life are the two most important things that a slave will gain from this mutual relation. For a slave, it will feel empty if no one willing to control and train it. Psychologically, this means we want something (i.e. the satisfaction due to being owned) but we cannot achieve what we want due to no one willing to do anything to give us what we want (i.e. not being owned).

As a slave, it is easy to tell the awful feeling of not being able to serve no one. We (slaves) get satisfactions after serving our owners. For example, I do all the tasks assigned by Mistress Leyla promptly, usually within a day or two, to make Mistress happy. I feel so happy if I managed to finish all the assigned tasks on time and when Mistress Leyla thanks for my good work (not always so good ). Similarly, I feel sad if I let Mistress Leyla down and make her feels disappointed. Of course, I get punished by Mistress Leyla but at the same time I learn how to improve and do better next time. This learning process not just makes me better but at the same time make me to feel I am playing a role in Mistress’s life. This warm feeling is something that I gained from this relation and I think this is a mutual relation which links Mistress Leyla and I together.

For all slaves, being owned means that they are now fully committed to serve their owners with no regrets. Similarly, for all Mistresses/Masters, owning slaves means they are committed to train up and to make them better. So far, I have just talked about physical ownership. There are many other types of ownership such as long-distance ownership, lifestyle ownership, financial ownership etc. Of course, the purpose of different types of ownership is different but the ultimate principle stays the same. We serve to appreciate our owners, and we get both physical and psychological satisfactions through completing tasks assigned by the owners. I do believe that ‘ownership’ or ‘being owned’ is still playing an important role in BDSM. I think most slaves are still treating ownership very seriously and most slaves will feel proud at the point when their owners collared them. At least for me, I feel so proud when Mistress Leyla collared me and let me to be her slave. Although I did do something which dissatisfy her at the time when I was writing this post, I enjoy being owned by Mistress Leyla because I am satisfied with my identity. I know that I am a slave and serving Mistress is my daily duty and if I am not performing well, Mistress Leyla will punish me hard because I know that Mistress Leyla would like me to become a better slave. Like all other relations, we will get good and bad times but since ownership is a mutual relation, the successfulness of this relation depends strongly on how much effort each party would like to commit to keep it running.

To conclude, I think ownership is a serious mutual relation which is not something that we should take it easy. Before committing to become an owned slave, one should ask if he/she is serious enough to play a part in maintaining this relation by serving his/her owner daily. If the answer is yes, then ownership is the thing one should go for. As I already mentioned, ownership is a mutual relation. If no one would like to input nothing, then this relation will not last long and the debate about why owning a slave or why being owned will just keep carrying on…

 

 


4 Oct 2021

Needs vs Wants in BDSM

As a Sub, it is always easy to tell what I want during a BDSM session. However, it is sometimes a bit more challenging to identify what I need. Needs and wants take similar meaning in board sense but these terms are different in the sense that 'need' tends to mean essential things while while 'want' usually means something is optional.

A successful BDSM session required the submissive fully understood what he/she would like to experience (i.e. wants) and also what he/she hopes Mistress Leyla will do (needs) during a session. As an example, I always imagine myself as a naughty slave who is a bit dangerous to Mistress Leyla (due to lack of discipline) so that I would like to be restraint, gagged and put in a cell/cage to reflect and control in every session. This is what I want. Similarly, I would like to be tied or chained up, blindfolded and gagged all the time during a session so that I will not have control on anything and Mistress Leyla will determine what to do on my body in the next few hours. This is what I want. I would like to be tortured and tormented by Mistress Leyla, using various tools and methods. This is what I want. I would like Mistress Leyla to control my behaviour and speak all the time so that I could only act and speak with Mistress's permission. This is what I want. Of course, I also want to be trained up by Mistress Leyla to be a better slave and hence I would like Mistress Leyla to assign me some daily tasks to do. Again this is what I want...

Practice makes perfect

Resulting form the lack of effectiveness in work while wearing shackles, I did promise Mistress to practice more at home when I have time an...