Philip has wanted to accompany me on a shopping trip for quite some time. What better time than Christmas time. The shops are packed, people rushing around - the ideal time to humiliate on mass.
Philip assumes he will just be carrying my shopping. He has no idea what I have planned for him.Yes, he will carry my heavy shopping bags - there is much Christmas shopping to be done, lots of Christmas presents and I don't want to be distracted by carrying any of it. Along with carrying my shopping, he will be paying for them with our usual agreed tribute. Sounds quite tame so far. He must carry the agreed tribute in a very large glittery Hello Kitty pink purse - which he will produce during every transaction in every shop. It must be placed in plain view of all the cashiers and the other customers. He must then ask the cashier if they like his purse, pay for the items and place the change in the purse.
He will also be wearing his electric dog collar under his scarf.
While I am browsing the shops, he is to follow me from a distance of 4 meters. At any time I may remotely activate his collar. This will amuse me no end as the reaction of those around will be quite interesting. If any of you know the collar (picture), you will be aware that it can be programmed with different electrical strengths and remotely activated.
Oh, and before I forget, he will also be wearing one of my T shirts over all his clothes.
I think I'll stop for a spot of lunch. Philip will sit at a table away from me - I can observe him. I will order his food. A selection of desert and mains. He will mix them together and eat them as one dish. I will also zap him a few times with his collar while he is eating. I'm sure that will also amuse me greatly.
This is going to be a fun 2 hour excursion.
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1 comment:
This will be a shopping trip he will never forget.
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