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A chosen profession. - Part 1

Part 1: 

Occasionally, very occasionally I wonder if my chosen profession is a good one. The thoughts usually come from self doubt, ideas instilled in my mind from youth and a general quietness on the business front.

I question the reasons for my career choice, whether I am a good dominatrix, if I am too hard or too soft. Sometimes I have to remind myself that, for whatever reason I have chosen this path, it is, like every other profession, a job - albeit, with sadistic differences - it pays the bills.

In my years as a professional domme, I have met many Mistresses and Masters. Some 'live' the life 24/7, some pretend to live the life, some see it as a means to an end and don't enjoy their work. Others, like myself, don't live a 24/7 BDSM lifestyle, yet enjoy and relish their work.

I chose not to like a 24/7 BDSM lifestyle because I am not wholly one character or personality. In private, I am quite shy, enjoy my own company and would rather spend a Sunday afternoon tending to my plants in my garden or rescuing insects, bugs and other creatures from natural disasters. I find the company of animals far more satisfying than the company of humans - I don't have a high regard for the human race. That doesn't mean I'm with Greenpeace or wear open toed sandals with my socks either. This is just part of who I am - a complex individual - one who enjoys solitude, philosophy, politics, educating the mind and meditation. 

But, there is the side of me which is sadistic, wicked and controlling. When I was very young, my family used to laugh at my two distinct characteristics - the gentle and the wicked -  blaming it on generations of "Anatolian warrior blood" from my mother's side. Maybe so..who knows. That is why I am comfortable with who I am in the dungeon, relish it and feed off it - but choose solitude at home.

Part 2: ..... soon

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Your worst nightmare? A BDSM style sexy assault by Agent Provocateur

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