READERS

28 Mar 2013

Creativity....Art and Talent combined equals....



A little something for those who enjoy creativity and uniqueness in Art. 


This video was created by shared with Me on my Google+ page by Adam Wayne Gistarb Photography, Performing Arts, Filmmaking ). 



The dancer/choregrapher/poet  featured in the video is Louiszell Alexander III


So, if you like it - Promote it!!

And #follow these guys on Google+





A little boy attempting to be insulting.....

This email was sent to me earlier today......

To give you an overdose of your own medicine and to see if a cheap piece of shit like you can take it as well as you give. You love beauty and glamour? Pity your not endowed with either then,is it? You are giving sexually oriented activities in return for financial renumeration. Only adults are permitted to view the site. And you're not a whore,you ugly self deluding cunt? Get fucking real you worthless reject fuckbag. You are nothing BUT a whore,you and every piece of shit who you FF. Hope you get cancer. Fuck you,you untalented sack of shit.

After laughing for quite some time, I thought a reply was needed......

To the person calling himself Jeremy Smith who sent this email to me.

Firstly, if you are going to insult someone in a written form, check your spelling, grammar and punctuation.

Secondly, make sure your disparaging comments ARE actually insulting. Your attempt at being scurrilous is amusing at best, (please do look up any words you don't understand in a dictionary). The epithetical terms used to describe me are not very creative or prolific, but I'm guessing you can't spell anything more epithetical than 'whore'. There are other words for 'whore' in the English language - perhaps a thesaurus would help.

Please let me know if you would like me to re-write the carelessly and fallaciously written paragraph you emailed to me. I would be more than happy to correct your disturbing grammar and punctuation as well as highlight your incorrect spelling. As it stands, it is quite substandard.

Regards,

Mistress Lady Leyla

P.s I almost forgot to mention...but the names Trevor and/or ROBERT come to mind?

21 Mar 2013

The Subject of Murder and Sexual Norms


21 MARCH 2013 | BY MATTHEW REISZ

Lisa Downing, University of Birmingham
SOURCE: EUGENE DOYEN
Lisa Downing explains to Matthew Reisz how society’s unspoken prejudices are given voice in the discourse surrounding killers


Drawn to the extremes: Downing argues that murder is ‘highly codified and very historically specific’
On the publication of her new book, Lisa Downing explains to Matthew Reisz how society’s unspoken prejudices are given voice in the inflammatory discourse surrounding its murderers

The idea that murderers are entirely different from the rest of us serves a very conservative function,” says Lisa Downing. “We don’t have to worry that we might be implicated because those people are other than us and we are safely within the mainstream.”

Now professor of French discourses of sexuality at the University of Birmingham, Downing has written, co-written and edited books on critical theorist Michel Foucault, film star Catherine Deneuve and director Patrice Leconte, as well as Birth and Death in Nineteenth-Century French Culture (2007), Film and Ethics: Foreclosed Encounters (2009) and Queer in Europe: Contemporary Case Studies (2011). Coming next year is a volume of “critical essays on [sexologist] John Money’s diagnostic concepts” by her, Iain Morland and Nikki Sullivan, to be titled Fuckology.

Yet, despite this striking range of subject matter, Downing believes her career has been “underpinned by an interest in questions of how subjectivity and sexuality are understood in culture, how they are formed, what value judgements are brought to bear on so-called ‘normal’ and ‘abnormal’ varieties of them. What unites almost all of my work is a concern with interrogating that idea of ‘normal’, questioning who gets to decide what is ‘normal’ and in whose interests.”

Yet there has also been a certain change of emphasis: “I have moved from taking the ‘abnormal’ as fascinating subject matter to be prodded and poked to yield up answers towards looking at precisely the ways in which the ‘abnormal’ subject gets constituted and what that says about the social forces doing the constituting.”

We can see this shift in the move from Downing’s first book, Desiring the Dead: Necrophilia and Nineteenth-Century French Literature (2003) to the recently published The Subject of Murder: Gender, Exceptionality, and the Modern Killer.

So what drew her to such extreme material in the first place? Part of what makes necrophilia worth studying, she replies, is that it “remains in the sphere of psychiatry and medico-legal discourse and has not become a subject of politics in the way that LGBTQ issues obviously have, and practices like BDSM and sadomasochism, which have a whole group of defenders who say: ‘We are just like the rest of you, except that we like kinky sex’. It hasn’t been tamed by the assimilationist brigade.

“Necrophilia and other perversions that have death as part of their content are interesting because they literalise the fear underpinning the regulation of all non-normative sexuality…that any sexual practice that couldn’t lead to reproduction was dangerous and could lead to the downfall of Western civilisation. However, the very existence of so-called ‘sexual perversions’ reveals the lie that sexuality is utilitarian, that desire is naturally for a purpose - ie, reproduction.”

In describing her new book, Downing suggests that “people think of murder as this deep dark personal thing and I argue that it’s a highly codified and very historically specific phenomenon which comes from the aesthetic philosophies of Romanticism, decadence and later existentialism”.

Although there have always been homosexual and homicidal acts, specific cultural pressures turned acts into essences and created the figures of “the homosexual”, “the pervert” and “the murderer” at roughly the same time.

 To develop her argument, Downing returns to 1830s and 1840s France to examine the “gentlemanly” murderer (and poet) Pierre-François Lacenaire and the “angel of arsenic”, Marie Lafarge. Yet she soon moves on to more familiar murderers notable for “the sheer weight of representation they have provoked”: “Jack and the Rippers who came after”; Myra Hindley; Dennis Nilsen; the client-killing prostitute Aileen Wuornos; and the “kids who kill”, such as those responsible for high-school massacres, or the death of James Bulger.

Oceans of ink have been spilled in trying to understand this grim cast of characters, but Downing is adamant that she is “a cultural critic and continental philosopher” rather than a psychologist or criminologist, and so is “not qualified to do psychiatry on these people”.

Instead of providing yet more “interpretations of their motivations or their psychology”, she explains, “I’m offering analyses of the discourses produced about them, and what those discourses say about the society doing the producing”.

What emerges, as she puts it in The Subject of Murder, is that “the historical stereotypes of the Romantic figure of the outlier, the genius- criminal, the sex-beast, or the unnatural figure of the violent woman resurge in order to isolate those individuals from the rest of their culture and to maintain them as (sometimes glamorous) monsters, but never as mirrors”.

And one of the things Downing wants us to see reflected back is how murderous acts get interpreted differently according to the class, sexual orientation and (particularly) the gender of the perpetrator.

Take the response to the Moors murders of the mid-1960s.

“Hindley and [Ian] Brady are both reviled as child killers, as the lowest of the low,” acknowledges Downing, “because children are given a special status as innocent and the most in need of protection.

“However, for a woman to kill a child is seen as infinitely worse, because women are supposed to possess those qualities of maternal instinct, ethics of care and innate nurturing protection.”

In the long history of sexual double standards this might seem like a rather minor example, but Downing describes it as “a very telling form of misogyny…It’s precisely in the way that people receive news items and cultural phenomena such as murderers that we actually see misogyny at work.”

Myra Hindley and Ian Brady
SOURCE: PA/GETTY.   Myra Hindley and Ian Brady
She adds: “When people say: ‘I can’t put my finger on it, but she bothers me’ - that’s what’s of interest. It’s in areas like crime that often unspoken prejudices are allowed to be voiced, because who’s going to defend Myra Hindley?


“And I don’t want to defend Myra Hindley, but I do want to show how the figure of Myra Hindley reveals virulent misogyny that in other spheres would probably be more hidden, because of the demands of political correctness, workplace regulations and all the rest of it.”

Perhaps even more compelling is the contrast between Peter Sutcliffe and Wuornos. When the Yorkshire Ripper killed 13 women from 1975 to 1980, he became a sort of local folk hero. Football crowds were heard to chant “Ripper 11, police nil”, while Jim Hobson, the acting chief constable of West Yorkshire Police, made a point of stating: “He has made it clear that he continues to hate prostitutes. Many people do. We as a police force will continue to arrest prostitutes…”

Why is it, asked feminist critic Nicole Ward Jouve, that “no women go about murdering ‘punters’, convinced they’re on a God-given mission to rid the city of its litter?” A possible exception to this rule is provided by Wuornos, who, at least at one point, defended herself in just such terms: “I feel like a hero. ‘Cause I’ve done some good. I’m a killer of rapists.”

Yet it was precisely this narrative that nobody wanted to hear.

“Where the (male) serial killer is an unlikely hero, a bad boy celebrity,” writes Downing, “the feminist warrior is not even articulable.” Commentary on Wuornos’ case, when it didn’t turn her simply into a “monster” (as Patty Jenkins’ 2003 Hollywood biopic is called), viewed her as mad or, at best, a victim of earlier abuse.

In every case, Downing demonstrates that the murderers, though hardly typical, were nonetheless symptomatic of wider social attitudes and problems that we often shy away from.

“Of course, people should be upset by acts of violence,” she concludes, “but they should also be upset by the violence implicit in systems and institutions - and not so keen to use these figures of exception to draw attention away from those larger systems of iniquity.”

BDSM without sex??

 
http://www.sunnymegatron.com/bdsm-without-sex/
The 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon has everyone talking about kink.  

This is part of a series of articles called Beyond 50 Shades of Grey that take a deeper, more realistic look at elements of BDSM.  Get ready to go Beyond 50 Shades. 

When we hear words like fetish, kink, BDSM or S&M we immediately think sex.

BDSM is an acronym many in the mainstream consider synonymous with S&M.  Technically it stands for bondage & discipline (BD), dominance & submission (DS) and sadism & masochism (SM).  In other words– whatever it is you like that’s kinky, whether on the giving or receiving end, is included in the all encompassing label of BDSM.

This umbrella acronym covers more than being restrained, humiliated, spanked, acting as a slave or servant, etc.  Kink preferences are as individual as those practicing them.  For instance, some may like sensation play  (anything from feathers, silk, massage oils to pain inflicted with various implements) while others might enjoy sensory deprivation (being blindfolded or having another one of the senses taken away).  Just because someone is into something considered kinky, they don’t necessarily like everything BDSM signifies–  i.e. I love to give and receive spankings but that does not mean I’m also into humiliation role-play.

BDSM’s appeal often isn’t about sexual sensation and gratification, it’s primary draw is the mental give and take (sometimes referred to as power exchange).  This concept trips a lot of vanilla-leaning people up.  In the media S&M clubs are referred to as “sex clubs” and professional dominatrices as “sex workers.” How can BDSM not include sex?

In vanilla scenarios we often say “the biggest sexual organ is the brain.”  Most of us have been in a romantic situation with someone who on the surface isn’t stereotypically attractive but we’re still drawn to them.  Perhaps they’re funny, deep and thoughtful, or creative and intense.  Whatever the point of attraction, it’s directly related to the mental connection you have with each other. Your romantic interest takes you on a cerebral rollercoaster ride so enjoyable you don’t want to get off. Often our most profound, satisfying relationships aren’t based on looks or sexual ability but on how the mental connection with that person makes us feel.

Mental and emotional attraction in BDSM plays on the same principles but on a grander and more deliberate scale.  Going into a vanilla relationship we are generally not equipped with the tools or knowledge necessary to successfully cultivate exciting mental rollercoaster rides.  If we do connect on that level, it’s usually an accidental byproduct of the pairing.  We have no control over it– it just “happens” (and when it does happen we’re immensely happy!).

For most kinksters our goal from the get-go is psychological gratification.  Before embarking on a relationship/pairing we arm ourselves with tools that allow us to more predictably arrive at that goal.  Participants in BDSM relationships spend a good deal of time on pre-negotiation to ensure each partners needs are met.  We also expect situational, physical and psychological variables to be manipulated during scenes to help everyone involved achieve intense emotional satisfaction.  Sometimes genital contact is a part of that and sometimes it isn’t.

In the vanilla world we can have an intense emotional experience with someone without sex or romance.  Many of us can relate, we’ve had emotional connections and experiences with individuals we never laid a hand on. Our pleasure is a derivative of how that person made us feel. Perhaps they made us feel giddy and giggly, proud of ourselves, appreciated, etc.  It is no different in BDSM scenes.  We don’t have to have sex or be sexually aroused to satisfy our psychological needs.

Asexuals have a visible presence in the kinky community.  An asexual (ace for short) is defined as someone who does not experience sexual arousal.

http://www.sunnymegatron.com/bdsm-without-sex/
The excerpt below was written by a “kinky ace” named Lamia S.  In it Lamia explains how she receives non-sexual gratification from BDSM.  Her writing is universal and covers a myriad of reasons why people, asexual or not, explore kinky play.

Give it a read.  It may help you understand why BDSM is about a lot more than just sex:

“I’ve gotten a fair amount of questions, some curious and respectful and others judgmental and rude, about why I’m into kink if I don’t desire or gain sexual gratification. It is a fair question given that theorists, researchers, and some others have long ago decided that BDSM is sexual. In fact I one book went as far as to say that Aces don’t practice BDSM but only engage in “BDSM-like activities” because somehow, this theorist decided that without sex it doesn’t count. I’m pretty sure that people that know me and other Kinky Aces would agree that we count just as much as anyone else. But back to the question, Why Kink? Why play? Why Switch*? Why be a member of a community where the majority of people are very sexual? As I’ve told people, pleasure doesn’t have to be sexual nor do meaningful relationships. But my usual answers are fairly vague or if the person is rude sarcastic. So what is a more clear passionate answer? Here it is.

Topping

So, why top if not sex? There are a lot of things I love about topping. It’s the freedom to release my inner sadist and monster. It is the trust you build when a friend and partner gives you control. It is the power of having another person at your whim. It is the predatory mindset of domspace. It is the sharp tunnel vision of a hunting predator. It’s the thrill of the “hunt”. It’s the maniacal laughter of the sadist in my head when someone agrees to a scene. It’s the learning and mastering of skills. It’s the absolute giddy joy of hitting some one that wants it. It’s the glory of sinking my teeth into squirming flesh. It’s the moment of impact when my hand collides with the skin of another. It’s the feeling of a knife, cane, flogger, or whip as an extension of myself. It’s the beauty of the marks I leave. It is the smiles, the laugher, the screams, the tears, and the connections that only kink can create.

Bottoming

By now maybe you are starting to see a little of my point, but you could still be wondering. So, why bottom if not sex? For me it is about the anticipation before a scene. It’s the thrill of terror. It is the freedom from facing fears. It’s the surrender of power. It’s the pride in making another happy. It’s the glee of attention. It’s the relief of helplessness. It’s the hug of rope and chain. It’s the sting of a cane. It’s the thud of floggers. It’s the pound of a fist and the smart of a slap. It’s the dread of the voice in my ear. It’s the constraint of a hand on my neck. It’s the weightlessness of suspension. It’s the leap of my stomach right before I hit the ground. It’s the comfort of protocol. It’s the joy of survival. It’s the gorgeousness of the marks a top leaves. It’s the high from endorphins. It’s the floaty fuzzy calm of subspace. It’s the trust I’ve learned to give. It’s the protection I’ve learned to accept. It is the smiles, the laugher, the screams, the tears, and the bonds that only kink can create.

Play and Community

Hopefully you are understanding my point. But there is still more I want to say. I wanna tell you why in general. Why play and why be part of the community? The play is about the connection. It’s the friend-relation-ships I thought I’d never have. It’s about sensation. It’s about overcoming. It’s about creation. It’s about being creative. The community is about the bonds. It’s about acceptance. It’s about not being pressured to be what I’m not. It’s about be liked for who I am. It’s about the encouragement to find who I can be. It’s about having a place where I fit without modifications. It’s about energy. It’s about the caring, the support, the give, the take, the respect, the balance that only an island of misfit toys like the Kink Community can muster.

So no, my kink is not about sex, it is about other things. I don’t have want to have sex with you to learn from you or to teach you. I don’t need sexual attraction to care or support my fellow perv. Everyone is different, and that’s great and the Kink community is great at being ok with that.

That is why BDSM. That’s why I’m a Kinky Ace and proud. <3″

COURTESY OF SUNNY MEGATRON MAY 21, 2012, 

Practice makes perfect

Resulting form the lack of effectiveness in work while wearing shackles, I did promise Mistress to practice more at home when I have time an...