Thinking Kink: Is BDSM Therapy "A Dangerous Method"? | Bitch Media

I hope I've already covered plenty of ground about the differences between consensual kink and actual abuse. However, I think some people still believe that even if BDSM itself is not an abusive act, the only person who would willingly consent to it must be "a damaged victim choosing submission as a way of healing from or processing past trauma" (Stacey May Fowles). This assumption does not match up with reality—several studies  found no higher rates of past abuse or trauma among BDSM practitioners than among non-kinky people. However, it's equally unhelpful to dismiss the experiences of those who do practice BDSM "to gain control over trauma by eroticizing it"(Margot Weiss).

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Thinking Kink: Is BDSM Therapy "A Dangerous Method"? | Bitch Media

Erasing the Politics of Consent: What You Won't Learn From "Fifty Shades of Grey"

Erasing the Politics of Consent: What You Won't Learn From "Fifty Shades of Grey"

Introducing the Tom of Finland BDSM stamps

(Original article: dazeddigital + Zing Tsjeng )

New Finnish stamps will feature graphic illustrations from the king of the crotch bulge.

The full stamp sheet

Courtesy of Itella Posti Oy; original image from Tom of Finland Foundation

Tom of Finland, the king of the crotch-bulge, has just landed his own stamp collection. The iconic (and very graphic) work of the artist is set to adorn a new line of commemorative stamps in his native Finland, celebrating his status as one of the country's most internationally well-known artists.

QUESTION: How has Fifty Shades of Grey been received in the BDSM community?

ANSWERS: feel free to add yours in commentrs

Alice Tsymbarevich, Linguist-turned-artist-turned-mechanic

All forums and comments I've seen about the book could be summed up by "boring vanilla". I find this too judgemental and I am trying to be objective. There is strong side and weak side to the book. The strong side is the Dominant protagonist: he introduces the kink to a vanilla virgin in a moderate, intelligent way, even if hasty, which is understandable because he's mistaken her for a natural sub (big mistake). And the kink and the Dom side are real, I totally empathize with those. The weak side is that the author quickly makes several major slips that totally ruin the Dominant for me. Well into the book he becomes pliable, prone to forget his words, inconsistent, and these are not Dom qualities. And the girl's character is simply disgusting, but it's got nothing to do with BDSM, she's just stupid.

tl;dr - this book can actually introduce a vanilla person to some basic notions about BDSM, but as far as actual D/s relationship go, this is very far from reality.

 

Molly Moore, collared submissive, mum, slut, blogger, lover of life and all that it brings. Owned by @Domsigns Creator of #sinfulsunday

QUESTION: What are the effects of mainstreaming BDSM?

ANSWERS: 

(Add yours too)


If BDSM is introduced to mainstream culture in a realistic way that portrays it as healthy sex between consenting adults as opposed to degenerate sexual deviancy, it could be a great thing. There are a lot of kinky people out there who are still ashamed of their sexual fantasies, especially in a BDSM context, and if it was to be shown as just another side of sex then it might lead to fewer unnecessary feelings of guilt in people who have those desires. The problem is, a lot of mainstream media shows all BDSM as an exclusively dark, edgy thing. Look at every procedural crime drama that's ever had an episode revolving around a dominatrix or a BDSM club - the people who partake in those activities are always shown as twisted, creepy deviants, when this is by and large not the case at all. The real kink community is, generally speaking, full of open, positive people. But media doesn't focus on that part of it - they don't show the loving husband and wife who beat the daylights out of each other and then snuggle and kiss afterwards, they'd rather focus on the scandalous and often untrue side of things. It could be very interesting to see healthy portrayals of it become common in mainstream media, but I'm afraid I'm not holding out much hope for that.

Arden Fraser, Hopeful Narrative Designer

Assuming it were gradually accepted as part of the spectrum of human sexual activity, it would probably lead to a much more sophisticated, mature and fact based attitude and understanding of sexuality in society. Whether it is mainstreamed or not does not change the fact that it occurs more than most people think it does and amongst people most wouldn't suspect. So, either we can continue to live in ignorance and with blinders on or we can bring things out into the light, acknowledge their existence and understand them for what they are. Bringing things into the mainstream does not mean we have to accept them. But it does make it much more difficult to take advantage of societal ignorance.

Deliciously Sinful, incredibly Wicked

I'm guessing if you're reading this blog then you're interested in or admire the fantastic Lady Leyla and what she has to say, or maybe you're teetering on the edge of booking a session with her but haven't quite worked out if that's what you want. Whatever you're here for maybe this will help.

I first met Lady Leyla a few years ago; I'm not a submissive person at all but I do have a masochistic streak buried in my psyche and wanted to explore that aspect of myself. I'd had some experiences which had left me feeling both unrewarded and unfulfilled. I decided to give it one more chance and Googled away to see what i could find, one of my searches turned up the website of this beautiful young lady named Leyla. She seemed to know what she was talking about and looked to have all the equipment available you could ask for. I got in contact and we exchanged a couple of calls and emails, next thing I was turning up at her dungeon (but only after my sat-nav had sent me down numerous wrong turnings and dead ends making me terribly late). It wasn't a problem, in fact I was greeted like a long lost friend. I'm not going to go into the details of what happened then but all you need to know was I'd never felt so good. She was just perfect; putting me totally at my ease, listening and discussing my every request, putting forth her own excellent ideas, enjoying our interaction, immersing herself fully into the role play scenario we'd devised and at all times ensuring neither hers or my safety or limits were ever compromised. I couldn't have asked for more, in fact it was way better than I ever expected. I was left totally fulfilled and very happy.

Criminalising kink: Camerons porn crusade

This article is the part of the Index on Censorship Young Writers / Artists Programme

By Jonathan Lindsell / 11 April, 2014

Protesters gathered outside a Stop Porn Culture conference in March 2014 organized by Gail Dines. Protesters included porn stars, filmmakers, artists, sex workers and supporters who believe in freedom of expression.

Protesters gathered outside a Stop Porn Culture conference in March 2014 organised by Gail Dines. Protesters included porn stars, filmmakers, artists, sex workers and supporters who believe in freedom of expression.