Domme + sub. The most honest relationship you will ever have.

The relationship between a Domme and a submissive is probably the most honest relationship there is. There is no need for lies and half truths or secrets. This fact is not always on the forefront of my daily thoughts, but occasionally something is said or acted upon which reminds me just how open and honest a BDSM relationship can be.

A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of one of my long term submissives kneeling before my feet. We had just finished an hour's intense session and we were winding down, discussing the session and catching a few minutes of calmness. 

My submissive looked at me and said. "Mistress, you are the one person on this earth that I can be truly myself. Be truly open and honest with you. I can talk about issues in my daily life which are problematic . Share my most inner thoughts with you. I don't have to pretend about who or what I am. I can be me."

I am not often speechless or void of an instant reflective comment.The brutal sincerity and openness between a sub and Domme is something I know well. His comments slapped me into remembering this much taken for granted fact, and like a long forgotten ache, I had the realisation that I had grown complacent to the wonders of such an sincere and straightforward relationship.

As Dommes, we are not singularly defined or characterised by our skill with a bull whip. And our subs are not simply our play things - to degrade, humiliate and hurt then throw away. We become their counsellors. Their trusted confidant. A friend whom they can trust without question. Our responsibilities as Dommes grows from safe, sane and consensual to encompass spiritual, mental and emotional wellbeing.

I am glad I was reminded about how special a BDSM relationship can be, how difficult if not impossible  it can be to find anything resembling this openness in the vanilla world,  because the vanilla world is the fictional picket fenced country house. Full of insecurities, lies and deceptions.  Bdsm allows one to be free - in thought and structure. Free from casual social restraints, cultural binds and moral servitude.  

The Novice - 1st hand account of a #BDSM session with Mistress Leyla

Written by Back2egg. This story is an account of a session we had together. It was a 2 hour, so a long piece of writing. Enjoy.

The original can be seen HERE:

I lay naked face down on the floor as my nipple clamps were beginning to bite. I could hear a rummaging as Mistress Leyla searched out of my sight.

“I’m just looking for something for you to ride,” She muttered deliberately teasing. I remembered what I had put in my e-mail but was She really going to go through with it? Earlier I was surprised to go outside and for Her to fulfill my first fantasy but surely the next thing I asked for was going beyond Her remit.

It was if there was a refusal to believe that these fantasies could come true even though Mistress did nothing to hide Her agenda. It wasn’t until I was struck on my buttocks for being late that I really believed I was going to be punished. It was not until I was naked outdoors did I believe that would happen, despite being on a lead indoors going through doggie commands.

The denial going through my head was absolute and even when Mistress Leyla said, “I’m looking for something for you to ride” I still didn’t believe what I was in for.

“Turn over She ordered and I obeyed the long nipple clamps catching on the floor and whipping around on release as my body turned. I lay on my back and looked up and caught sight of myself in an overhead mirror.

Yes it really was me, I had final submitted whole-heartedly to a Mistress and was awaiting more torments. I was in a dream, I congratulated myself for making it to the world of my fantasies but was She really going to shaft me?

I looked to the side, still not daring to believe and I saw Mistress with a large pink tapered strap-on protruding from Her crotch. I swallowed hard as She expertly rolled on a condom along its entire length. I began to worry a little; the strap-on was at least eight inches long and when a man is going to be on the receiving end of a phallus you don’t exaggerate.

Mistress strolled casually towards me stroking Her cock slowly, either to tease or torture me mentally, or professionally ironing out any air bubbles. She stood upright between my legs.

“All of our strap-ons are cleaned thoroughly.’ She announced, to allay any fears. I did feel better for that information but with it came the realization that I really was going to get shafted!

“First I want you to suck my cock!” She stated with relish and knelt to my side Her knees in-between my arm and torso. I wondered how She was going to take me, was She going to do me missionary style where I was laying, getting me to pull my legs up so I would be in the diaper position or have me on all fours and have me doggie style? There was a bondage table waiting menacingly in the corner of the room and I thought She would take me there rather than join me on the floor.

She offered Her cock to me and for the time being I would do my best to please Her. I didn’t mind being humiliated, that didn’t hurt and as long as Her cock was in my mouth it wasn’t going to be doing damage elsewhere.

“Suck it!” She commanded with authority and I quickly lifted my head to clamp my mouth on Her strap-on.

I sucked quickly noticing the latex sheath on my tongue. As my head motioned back and forth my teeth lightly chattered on Her cock and I forced my jaw to open wider not wanting to puncture the condom.

“Lick it!” She demanded and I instantly disengaged my mouth and went to sliding my tongue along the length.

“Suck it!” She quickly revised and once again Her cock was in my mouth slowly fucking away with tiny thrusts.

Again the will to please Her took over and I tried to gobble as much of Her pink strap-on down my throat as possible.

“Good boy” She praised genuinely pleased with my efforts as I quickly worked up the length. I started to gag and was quickly instructed by Mistress.

How to fly (as in airplane) with BDSM related gear

Although the below article is in relation to the USA, I think most Transportation bodies would be the same including the UK & Europe. there is also an interesting article on Prodomme.com

Hitting the Road - Traveling with Bondage Toys

Transexualism, Feminism, and Gender / The Great Transsexual Radical Feminist Menace

Exploring my pc I discovered a couple of articles I had saved on the feminist criticism of transexuals. They are dated 2008, so obviously some time ago. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to locate the original posts to refer to them. But, I'm going to post them here anyway....

Transexualism, Feminism, and Gender

" As aggressively vitriolic and hurtful as radical feminist criticism of transexuals often is, I believe that transexuals do themselves a grave disservice by dismissing that criticism as entirely rooted in blind transphobia. There is certainly a very strong element of transphobia in certain quarters of the feminist movement, but even a broken clock is right two times a day. It is hardly surprising that the majority of transexuals are heteronormative in terms of their chosen gender presentation and behaviour, but this becomes exceedingly problematic due to the extremely loud and highly active minority of transexuals who are militantly heteronormative.

A rather lovely quote - trans infighting

"All of us, "trans" or not, are on a journey - to find our authentic selves and find courage to live the lives we want. The word "transition," normally used to denote the transition from one gender role to another, ought to instead refer to a continuous process where one keeps finding, and implementing, one's true, self-identified identity, away from prevailing social expectations."

http://destrantalk.blogspot.co.uk/2010/02/transgender-infighting.html

The first TV/CD Support night presented by Support U.

Welcome to the first TV/CD Support night presented by Support U.

This evening is aimed at those wishing to explore the fem-side of their gender expression in a safe and inclusive environment. Come along, meet others in a similar(ish) situation, get some helpful hints and tips from people that can help you out and enjoy some tea and biscuits.

We have space for you to change here if you wish, or come as you are. Partners and supportive allies welcome if you want to bring them along. Don't feel that you have to dress up, coming drab is completely fine.

DATE: 17th December 2015

TIME: 19:00 - 22:00

WHERE: Support U - Resource service for LGBT in Thames Valley

ADDRESS: 15 Castle Street, Reading, Berkshire, RG1 7SB.

MORE INFO: SUPPORT U TV/CD NIGHT

I received a letter today......

Dear Mistress Leyla

I hope that you will find my email both respectful and full of admiration for a Lady I most certainly perceive to be a true Alpha female.

I like to think that I am not the stereotypical male driven purely by physical beauty, however I most certainly appreciate  the undeniable fact that you are to say the very least a  divinely beautiful Lady.

However after reading your words, via your very elegant website ,as well as some of the exerts on your twitter account, you physical beauty is clearly a projection of the beautiful person, you most surely are.

You are a Lady that clearly should be worshiped and adored by others, as you are one of those rare and real Women of true Supremacy in mind body and soul. With out question , you enrich those you deem worthy of your time and or presence. Possible even giving some a true direction to follow , as well as the joy that can come with higher meanings, and purpose.

I am sure you are fully aware of the force of nature you are , and how others will's bend at your whim , being as with out question once you enter another's mind they could not possible be the same again, nor would they wish to be.

I noticed your  enjoyment of chastity , which if I am honest , perked my interest , being as it  can be a deep and meaningful expression of devotion and surrender to another. After all where the mind goes the body surely will follow.  And chastity is most certainly a pure type of surrender, in both a mental and physical sense.  And of course any Dominant that can and does make a submissive wear such a device is surely a Dominant who both revels in, having a true understanding of the true mental aspect of BDSM and the course and effects.

I am not a weak willed male lost at sea as it were , in fact I like to think I am the complete polar opposite to most, and have always tended to walk my own path . However in saying that , I understanding that all males worlds revolve around Females, to some extent. I most certainly have come to appreciate , admire and wish to adore those rare few such as yourself that truly understand the undeniable  power you wheeled.

In conclusion , I do hope that you will not find my message too random or , pointless even, I tend not to sit and compose such messages that often . But after coming across your site , I found that at the very least I wished to express , what I hope comes across as genuine admiration for a Lady that simply was meant to own others, and I admit I do envy those you do own.

yours with respect
Adrian