READERS

10 Oct 2014

The wannabe Dom's complaint

My dearest friend TawnyTrickster on Fetlife wrote this little article on his wall posts - and I loved it... I hope you enjoy it and Join him on Fetlife.

Original post: LINK HERE



Dear Fetlife,

 I joined your site over a week ago and I wish to point out my total dissatisfaction; I haven’t had any sex yet at all.

 I know just what you’re going to say but I fail to see why having no photos and no information on my profile should make any difference. I know for a fact others are the same yet they regularly inform me they’re getting their end away night after night.

 I joined and posted in at least half a dozen groups. My advert was short and to the point, “Kneel before me slut and suck my cock.” What’s not understandable about that? Not a single reply let alone a chance to fool around with a sweet young gal.

 I listed myself as a Dom (and what is it with all this weird capitalisation?) as I’m a man so obviously I can’t be anything else. Why do the subs not submit to me? Surely I should be inundated with offers of rumpy-pumpy? I’d have expected all the ladies to be begging me to slip them a hot beef injection? Nada.

 I see numerous old, short, fat and bald guys listed as playing with gorgeous girls half their age; how do they do that? Come on ladies, I’m a much better bet for a bit of banging! I’m young, fit, I’ll even send you pics of my cock to impress the hell out of you; what better invite could you receive for some jiggery-pokery?

 This is a place where I can find someone to dance the buttocks jig with right? Get some action going? Dip the wick? Come on you bitches, help a guy hit a home run. There must be someone out there as desperate as I am. Drop me a line here, I’ll even come to your place – my mom doesn’t like me having girls over anyway – and I can fill your juicebox for you with my creamy love liquid.

 Oh, so you want me to actually learn about this lifestyle, put some effort into it… Next you’ll want me to go on a voyage of self-discovery. I’m 19 years old FFS! I know what I want. Sheesh, all this just to get an opportunity to introduce the captain to his pie! Well I did read some of the stuff on here and it’s damn hot in places, but I’m more of a doer than a writer myself; I prefer to take a tumble in the hay over having to take the time and trouble to explain my thoughts and feelings to anyone.

 So I guess as I’m not having any luck with dunking my love muscle this maybe isn’t the place for me after all. I’m off to find some sleazy dating sites where I don’t have to pretend to be into the whole BDSM thing to get laid.

 Yours,

 A frustrated wannabe

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